RIP Whirlpool

September 16, 2008

Whirlpool model LXR9445JQ1 dies at 5 years old.

Beloved laundry unit known as “Sudsy” kicked the bucket last Wednesday night in a traumatic overloading incident. Owners tried to resuscitate Suds but efforts were met with a sharp screeching noise and a failure to drain. As a final insult, the machine formally rejected its lose knob and refused to let it be reattached. At that point, there were no arrows to lead the way between spin, rinse and delicates. It was time to let go. 

A memorial service will be held on Tuesday, September 23, prior to the arrival of Ken, the Kenmore. In lieu of donations, please send owners Nick and Marcy formal regrets for having to spend their hard earned cash on a large appliance, instead of a mini-vacation. 


Innocent 18

September 13, 2008

Last night we saw the fabulous Maroon 5 in concert. Counting Crows was the opening act and wow, before that I had not listened to the band since….since…I don’t know when. 

You know how an experience can send a rush of repressed memories back to your consciousness? Well at the first strum of the guitar I was 18 years old again, at the start of my freshman year in college. 

It was a classic New England fall day. The sun was out, the air was crisp and sunset colored leaves were falling all around me. I was standing alone staring up at my new brick home, tilted sideways from the weight of the books in my bag, detecting the distinct smell of marijuana wafting through the air, wearing Lands End hiking boots (no joke) coupled with an oversized college logo t-shirt and listening to the Counting Crows blasting from an out-turned speaker in a dorm room.

I remember the feeling of nervous excitement over my newfound freedom. I was still coming off of the high from the night before, when I realized that I could stay out until 3 a.m. without parental repercussions.

I had no idea that the next four years would be some of the best, and most transformative, of my life. I would spend that time laughing until I couldn’t stand up straight, dancing until the sun came up, falling in love, cursing the minus 11 degree winds, falling out of love, spending countless hours gossiping in the library, drinking until I wobbled, learning a little about biology and learning a lot about life. 

Last night was fun, but the trip back in time was even better.  ”….change, change, change…” 


Cali Coast Trip

September 7, 2008

This weekend Nick and I reached a California milestone – the Highway 1 drive. We started off going through the central coast to Monterey. It was a shock to see how rural this state really is once you step away from the chaos. Just remember to bring a nose clip because cow farms = bad, very bad, smells. 

The time went by fairly quickly, thanks to Stephen Colbert’s, “I Am America, (And So Can You!)” audiobook, and before we knew it we were checking into the hotel.

We roamed the town and had a blast scoping out the sights and pretending to be the mentally impaired, yet charming, Forest Gump. 

We even made friends with a fearless, and slightly feisty, bird. Unfortunately, Nick no longer likes our feathered friends because of an unfortunate shirt soiling incident that occurred later on during the trip. 

After a bottle of Spanish Grenache we were in bed early and were driving through Big Sur on schedule the next morning. The views did not disappoint. 

Roooomance!   

We continued south, and then the strangest thing started to happen. A marine layer/fog began to roll in. It was the heaviest blanket of white I have even seen. Suddenly, the blue waves turned into an ocean of clouds. 

The drive along the cliffs became precarious as the white fluff started pouring onto the roads. Suddenly our cruise turned into a slow crawl. The road mileage signs became painful visual reminders of our slow progression. 

Eventually we found ourselves at Hearst Castle, former home of William Hearst, an American newspaper magnate (click here for a history lesson). Needless to say, Hearst’s abode in San Simeone (one of many) was very luxurious. 

I imagine his lavish pool was the envy of all of his friends and the site of many scandalous evenings.

Lucky for those around him, he treated his circle well and build five star accommodations for their visits (very similar to the pull out couch our visitors are blessed with). No wonder the ranch became a getaway for the Hollywood elite. 

After two hours of living vicariously through Hearst’s show of riches, we were heading back to the car (unfortunate bird incident happens here) and on our way south again. 

We drove and drove, through San Luis Obispo, through Pismo Beach and stopped at Solvang. The town is a little Danish getaway, made famous by the movie Sideways. We sipped and swirled, had dinner and roamed the streets. 

Like a long lost friend, we were thrilled to see our freeway exit later that night. It was a long and wonderful day with a perfect ending – an enthusiastic greeting from one very happy dog.  

There were many life lessons during this trip and I feel like I came away from it a wiser person. Because I believe in sharing knowledge, I have listed out the most important points below: 

  • An Egg McMuffin will never cease to be excellent road food
  • If you stare at the seaweed long enough, a sea lion will eventually pop its head out of the water 
  • There is such a thing as too much salt water taffy 
  • You can, in fact, drive off of the cliffs in Big Sur if you are not careful 
  • Just because a winery has a tasting room, it does not mean that the wine will be good
  • If you are able to parlay your money into a media empire and build a castle on a hill, do it. 
  • A healthy marriage means surviving 15 hours in a car together without incident  
  • The happiest cows really do come from California 

The Clothes Dilemma

September 2, 2008

While one should not labor on Labor Day, I undertook a massive project this past weekend. The full closet reorg. 

Going through all the clothes that I had stockpiled over the last five years turned into a very nostalgic event. Hello pink skirt that I wore to my birthday party in 2004. Hello padded bra that enhanced many of my evenings – I can’t believe you have been stuck behind the dresser for all this time. Hello slightly cheap looking work suit that I thought looked very professional at the time of purchase. 

All in all, the project wasn’t as painful as I thought it would be. That is, until I decided to try on some old clothes. Well, hello black pants, gray skirt, Seven jeans and tan capris that no longer fit over my fat *ss. 

So here I am, faced with a timeless female dilemma. Do I wallow in thigh depression, put the size-too-small clothes back in the closet and say to myself, “if I lose five pounds these will fit again”? Or, do I accept the fact that I no longer have my party all night long physique, embrace the new curves and donate the bottom halves to our cleaning lady’s family?

For now, I choose denial.